Half an hour left of work, so without further ado:
Here's a nice rustic-looking tankard, something that a brooding, Conan-like fellow might drink his ale out of:
(Picture pulled to keep people happy...you can find the tankard in question here.)
Simple, but kinda cool. If you're a woodcutter living in a dark Germanic-style forest, this might be the tankard for you:
This thing is the real deal. Made in 1865, pewter with a glass bottom. Great for drinking ale or smashing someone in the head during a drunken brawl:
This one is a little prettier, but not "froofy" - perhaps the tankard of a merchant or a mercenary captain:
The tankard of a dwarf king with more than a few orc heads on his trophy rack:
Okay, now we're getting a bit too ostentatious. Badasses do not drink from tankards like this; only badass-wannabes with more money than cool:
Uh...yeah. Not even going to go there. Move along, move along...
Does someone need an axe to the face? Cuz that can totally be arranged. Just break the machinery that makes this abomination, destroy whatever stock you have left over, and then go into permanent exile where I can never find you again.